During a recent, heated conversation with my husband, I got slightly wound-up. It is totally standard for him to be cool as a cucumber while I flip out. I always tell myself I am going to stay calm, but it never really happens. He turned around, with an amused smile on his face and goes, “So, you know how hard it is to love you sometimes, right? Kait, just calm down.”
Calm down!? CALM DOWN?! If there is one phrase that will instantly make it impossible to “calm down”, that is probably it! However, I started laughing right along with him. I actually had to sit down on the floor with tears in my eyes from uncontrollable laughing. Because I know he loves me no matter what, plus, I am super-annoying and high-strung. And he is totally right. (Hey, sometimes you just need to laugh at yourself to get a new perspective.)
Competitive people can’t help it. I annoy myself right along with everyone else, if we are being honest. I want to just turn off the constant list of potential failures running through my head. I wish I could comfortably go to bed and fall asleep after coming in second place, but instead I will lay awake and analyze every move I made that landed me behind somebody else. I check off those boxes of various failures, agonizing over each one, vowing to never allow that to happen again. I will fall asleep eventually, promising myself to be the best next time. Then I wake up the next day and begin holding myself to that promise. It is exhausting.
Welcome to my type A life. #thestruggleisreal
I have matured to realize that some people just hate my confrontational nature. I think my personality is misunderstood. I am not trying to knock anybody else down, I am just trying to muscle my own way up. I get that this rubs people the wrong way, but I’m not changing anytime soon. I can’t sit back and let things play out. I can’t let go of the reins. It is too difficult for me to watch a train wreck unfold before my eyes, knowing that a little bit of effort on my part might have changed the outcome. I so badly want to be a super-cool, laid-back, type B who doesn’t give a crap – but it’s never going to happen. I am too much of a control freak, and I am waaayyy too competitive.
So without further ado, let’s get to the bottom of why us type As are just so hard to love:
Eleven Things Only Type A People
(And Those that Love Them) Understand
1. You have to win. At everything. EVERYTHING.
GPS time of arrival? Nope. That’s time to beat.
Fitbit’s Daily Showdown? A.k.a. I run on the treadmill until I am in first place, or die trying.
Fantasy football? If Freeman isn’t cleared on that concussion for another week, I will personally take down the entire Atlanta Falcons organization.
Mini golf? I NEED to get a hole-in-one, just so I can tell you to suck it.
Bake sale? My brownies better disappear like lightning. Please, God, let people buy all my brownies!
Foot race? Don’t make me laugh. Enjoy the taste of dust.
I could go on, but I am sure you get the point. Daily life is a contest, and losing is failure.
2. You cannot rest until your daily to-do list is checked off.
Husband: Why don’t you stop folding laundry and relax?
Me: Because I need to finish it.
Husband: Why can’t you finish it tomorrow?
Me: Because it is on TODAY’S to-do list, idiot.
Husband: Now that you are done folding laundry, why don’t you stop pacing the room and watch this show with me?
Me: I only need 628 more steps to overtake Tiffany R. in the Workweek Hustle! I am too close to victory to sit! (See item 1.)
Husband: You need help.
3. Throwing parties consumes your life.
My youngest is turning 4 in July = CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!
I will not rest until our backyard is transformed into an ice palace, the cake is a perfect depiction of Olaf, all the guests have become real-life replicas of Elsa and childhood dreams have come true.
4. Same goes for any holiday, really.
Christmas spirit, Pinterest valentines, Easter magic, leprechaun mischief, Halloween overkill…..When it’s holiday game time, you GO BIG OR GO HOME!
5. Home renovations = convincing yourself your home will someday be featured on HGTV.
My poor husband actually thought our bathroom reno was finished. I whipped my head around at this statement in disbelief! (Is he even looking at this unfinished room?! The walls are bare!) Then I informed him he would be installing crown molding and assisting me while I agonized over where to hang which pieces of wall decor….for 3 straight days….until I snap:
Me: Get the kids ready, we have to go back to HomeGoods IMMEDIATELY. NOBODY can enter this house until this room clicks, because it simply cannot be seen like this!
Husband: You still need help.
6. You count your calories, and hate yourself for it.
Well crap. That glass of wine just put me over my caloric budget today. Looks like I am now faced with the choice of burning extra calories at 9:30 pm, or going to bed with a belly full of wine and extra helpings of self-loathing. Decisions, decisions….
7. A trip the gym is actually your own personal Olympics.
When your body combat instructor tells you to bring it up to level 3, you actually do it. Even though you think one of your arms fell off 10 minutes ago. Then you start walking for your treadmill cool down, but somebody hops on the treadmill next to you and starts running. Naturally, now you have to crank it back up and run another mile too. You have no other choice! You can’t look weak in front of your fellow fitness peers! That’s a gold medal, ladies and gents! Only the strong win the gold! (Again, see item 1.)
8. When people ask you to sign up for a “run/walk 5k”, you simply cannot.
Ummm….So it’s a race? But you don’t try to beat your best time? You let people pass you? Some people just walk?…..I’m confused. (Again, see item 1.)
9. Casual debates become a matter of life and death.
If you come at me trying to change my mind on an issue, I will unleash a rapid-fire rebuttal that probably contains statistical data and fact citations. If I care enough to research said issue in the first place, I also care enough to make sure I can support my stance when it is questioned. Just remember not to take it personally. It isn’t about other people being wrong, but entirely about me being right. (Again, see item 1.)
10. If company is coming over, your home must be perfection.
Click the video below to watch how I freak out every single time we host company.
“There cannot be any sign of LIVING in this house!”
So funny. So accurate. Borderline sad.
11. Your kids are on a schedule, and you LOVE it.
Every time someone comments how annoying your strict household schedule is, you laugh in their face as your kids go right to sleep at their assigned bedtime annnnd don’t wake up until the next morning. Yup. I just threw a *tiny* bit of shade. Couldn’t help it. Schedules are where it’s at!
(12. You are slightly annoyed that this is a list of eleven, instead of a nice, round number like ten. Apologies.)
So there you have it! My whole long list of competitive crazy. I get that I drive you nuts. I might even insult you on occasion. (It’s called tough love, my dears.) All of us control freaks know you would like us to calm the heck down, but we probably won’t be relaxing anytime soon!
Just know that if you are lucky enough to love one of us type A’s, we are going to pave the way for you (through some micromanagement) and cheer for you (as long as you’re doing it the way we instructed you) just as much as we annoy you! It’s not nagging, it’s actually encouragement – just with swear words and deadlines. 😉